THE SAGACIOUS SAGI

It's a come back !

2012-02-08T20:22:00.002+05:30

I was mentally feeling full for a long time after my previous blog post ! Too many things, good things had happened ! Let me list them all for you :)

As soon as I quit that painful and boring job, I immediately got consulting assignments and I started as a freelance consultant. Half way through the first assignment, came the second one and currently I'm on the third with one more in cards :) That is quite something. People don't get to become a consultant when he/she is a fresher but all my assignments were great experiences! Each one with major learning, met new people, some very influential people and also some concepts that can never be learnt through textbooks !

Now to the best part and the most sudden and pleasant surprise of all ! A PhD Offer from Nanyang Business School, Singapore ! The experience of applying there itself was unique, as it was in reverse move. I was interviewed, found to be good, was made an oral offer and then only I applied and sent the documents ! Now that it is almost finalized, I am so excited ! PhD before 30 has been my dream ! Whatever consulting assignments or job I was at, my mind would silently wander in some laboratory setting, thinking where I would apply, what would be my research area, what I would do during the process and so many things. Now that it is all clear :) Now all that I should do is sit back, gear up to 5 and shoot myself into the sky for a thrill ! Research is my tonic to feel better, even if there are hardships, they all give me high :)

I suppose I could blog regularly about my varied experiences in a new place, a new country and a new lab soon :D

Only time will tell

2011-10-16T18:33:00.003+05:30

Blogging after months, but boy does it feel so good !!

I start by ranting. I wanted to do so so many things in 2011 but God dint carve me out for more than half of it. Its already October and I am still not settled after my masters. Oh yeah, that is one thing I am happy about. Ok, let me tell you all the good things that happened for the start of 2011.

Though I keep complaining about 2011, it is the year that changed my life. On the personal front, I had a major happy incident that changed my life altogether. I entered into a relationship with my best friend for 6 years, Bachu ! My soul mate and now everything :) That is a weird little story. No impulsive 'I Love Yous', no winking, no blushing or no cheesy lines. It was a rational discussion, if I may quote. We spoke and realised that 'there are noone more suited for us than us' and also we have been in a relationship for a long time but never realised it. I guess that is what happens when two best friends who know everything about each other get into a relationship. Everything is going on so so beautifully well now :)

I completed masters (by research) and earned the degree in August. It has been an amazing journey of ups and downs but what finally remains are the fantastic lab memories, lovable friends I made through the process an of course the knowledge gained. I loved my days at IIT and think back about it at many times.

Now the low part ! I have a serious problem. I am not cut out for office work. I realised it just 2 weeks into a job. I always have this serious urge to do something creative everyday, something lively that gives me a high. I am not the type who can sit in front of computer all day and do numbers, presentations. I want to be a continuous learner, a creator, a interactive human being and an innovator. All this is not achievable at the job. So I have decided to take up a job that involves half of it and do something exciting at the side. My fascination for marketing and advertisements has motivated me to look at that direction. I am planning to learn about the Ad industry with the help of a dear friend which will satisfy my inner thirst and also do a job for a living and for future PhD application costs (that will be steep). That is the plan but seriously no idea how this will progress. Now that I have started blogging again, I will be back to tell you more :)

TTFN :)

Love !

2011-07-18T20:42:00.003+05:30

Lone times have gone from my memories forever,
On my heart have you written, my lover.
Vastness of light has filled my room,
Emptying the sun you have lit it,my groom.

Living the moments we spent under the moon,
Overwhelmed with joy, God granted us a boon.
Veins are filled with your name of blood,
Eternity isn't far where affection is flood.

Long are our dreams these nights of chill,
One has become our hearts giving thrill.
Valentine, Oh you're the magic of my life,
End of days and beyond, I am your wife.

Cheesy but genuine attempt to show my love for you, Bachu. Lines of each para start with letters LOVE :) Love you my sweetheart !

Purposive sampling of thoughts

2011-04-24T20:31:00.003+05:30

For people who do not understand the title, it just means filtering and picking those thoughts that are clustered around a particular topic. But fortunately, I am not going to talk about any particular topic .I am going to write about how wonderful our mind is and how it is the best organizer in the world. It does and can do beyond what we think of as its ability.

I am very astonished by certain things that happen at times. Many of us would have driven a two-wheeler or car. But soemtimes I have strange thoughts while driving. Not just thought, but like a film flashing in my mind either about something that has happened or something that has never happened or that I have not seen. These scenes occur sequentially before my mind's eye but nothing happens to my motor skills or my vision or my hearing which are all coordinated well with the road. The entire sequence happens slowly one by one but actually I clearly remember that when it all began in my mind I was passing a tree and by the time it ended I had just passed the tree. How is it possible? Is it based on the fact that is shown in the movie Inception (a unit of time in the dream is lesser than in reality and so what happens during a dream is very slow or seems like it). So am I dreaming in the day, with eyes open and while driving steady? I do not know if it has happened to anyone else or whether people remember it even if they had experienced it but I have had this a number of times. You would not believe if I say that I have dreams about a particular sequence of life but no idea of what is happening or where but after a few days I have a deja vu of the same setting and sequence in real and I realise for a split second that I have been through this before. That feeling does not last longer but is very memorable. I feel strange now. Do these things happen to everyone? Or do others not observe it very closely?

Our mind, some people say, is capable of lifting or moving objects, running many thoughts parallelly and even make ourself so light like a leaf that others can lift us with a finger. I do not know about the first two but I can definitely say the third one works. I have lifted someone as heavy as me with just 2 fingers. The person to be lifted goes into beta state and rests the mind completely and I really do not know how, but the body becomes a leaf. I guess that is why we dont feel our weight in sleep and often end up with cramps in shoulder and neck in the morning due to putting all our weight on that body part all night (afterall, if we knew or felt the weight in our sleep, we would have changed position right?).

I am still amazed by the mind. I wish I do research in psycho-physiology and philosophy. God, I am so thankful to you and I am dumbstruck by your amazing creation. I bet, no science of today can do what you did millions of years ago.

New year, New life and things to do !

2010-12-30T18:46:00.004+05:30

Its that time of year when thoughts about resolutions are talked at every dinner table in a restaurant. I am going to write about my resolution too. I am going to resolve that in 2011, I would a do a good deed everyday - be it small or big, but it should be good not just for me but for at least one another human being. It sounds easy, but you know its really difficult to please others. That is where its tricky for me. But I have made a box called "My lil' good box" where I'd write everyday's good deed in a piece of paper and preserve. Hope it works. Fingers crossed !

Next thing that pops into my head is how 2011 is going to change my life. I am expecting big changes that would alter my life totally. A good job, a PhD, a new chapter of life. Busy life could even make me stop blogging, but I've trained myself to be a strong multi-tasker. I have a lot of dreams and aspirations. I want to follow my dreams and achieve my goals. I wanna keep learning all my life, do new courses always that will teach me more and more so that I have enough life experiments to do every day, all life. Philosophy is ultimate truth that can never be achieved but I would like to go as near to it as possible to feel content.

Some of the things I wanna do, not necessarily in 2011 are:
I want to make an upto-intricate detailed business plan for my entrepreneurial initiative that I have aimed for the year 2020. Oh come on, its not far, just a decade close :) I want to learn different styles of music, experiment voice culturing, voice synthesis and modulations. I want to learn Kalamkari painting, pottery and weaving arts. I want to be a freelance travel-writer (if possible try to make it my profession) because simply put, I'm mad of travelling (though not done it much) and i love writing. I want to learn pastry making and bake every possible thing on earth. I want to perfect the languages I know, get to speak fluently in French, German and Korean so that it would help in travel-writing. I want to build my own home in a quasi indian-french architecture and learn landscaping to make a beautiful garden and roof lawn with oonjal for my mom.

OMG ! How am I gonna do all this? I know I will but don't know when ! hope it all happens soon enough :)

Happy new year :) :)

எதிர்பார்ப்பு

2010-11-02T20:56:00.000+05:30

தமிழில் வரும் உருவம் மனம் கவரும் நிழல் உருகும்
மலரில் விழும் மகரம் ப்ரிய நினைவில் பூப்படையும்.
தவழும் சிறு கரமும் வளை உடுத்தால் சிறை விடுக்கும்
வளையும் தனி மனமும் சிலை வடிவம் தனை அணுகும்.

நெருடும் சுவை மொழியும் தடுமாறும் புது வழியும்
நிலையம் அதை மறக்கும் மதி உதயம் கண்டு பிறக்கும்.
சுவையும் அதன் சுயமும் நினைப்பதனால் வரும் மயக்கம்
இடையில் அசை உடையால் இருளாகும் உயர் இமயம்.

கிரகம் கொடுவரத்தால் அல்ல வலையின் சில செயத்தால்
நிலையில் ஒரு நெறியில் நகைபோலே பொன் மனத்தால்
கவி உயிராய் வரு கருவாய் உயர் மதியாய் இருந்தாலும்
நிறையாய் வந்த நரனாய் சக ஸ்ருதியாய் இருத்தல் போதும்.

Sweet little things

2010-10-25T18:41:00.002+05:30

Innumerable coincidences prove to us that there are things that Nature/God wants us to thoroughly enjoy and relish.

A colleague bringing you hot chocolate or hot latte to your desk while you work, who does not know you have a cold and would love to drink a good hot beverage. You bless that soul and enjoy every sip of that hot drink. Amazing time !

Mommy giving a nice cozy massage on the neck when you stretch your limbs. Daddy calling you while you are travelling back home after a tiring day, just to tell you that he bought 'molaga bajji' for you. What beautiful moments of tiny joy !

On one of those slow days at work, your brother calls from a distant land to say he is coming back home for a holiday or your friend is calling to inform you about her recently fixed up wedding. Sudden spring of happiness that keeps you cheerful the whole day.

Some random uncle or aunty smiling at you in the train while you are upset about fighting with your parents just few minutes back, for some stupid reason. You immediately wanna say sorry to them.

The pride of giving your seat in the bus to a challenged or elderly person, when all others are just looking at various directions, is enough to keep you high the whole day. Buying an ID card holder from a blind salesman and keeping photos of loved ones in it, just for the sake of using it, will give you that day's positive energy.

Waiting in the doctor's clinic for your turn, meanwhile talking with concern to the old grandma in the next seat asking her not to worry about her diabetes test, when you leave she gives the smile of relief. It feels so good and makes you forget why you are visiting the doctor.

All these things have happened in my life. I wish everyone experiences it and enjoys those sweet little things :)

Men, for your eyes only !

2010-09-05T18:21:00.001+05:30

After all the life experiences, the small talks, the gossip and uninterrupted thinking, I finally made up my mind to talk the truth about women. This is for all those broken hearts asking a thousand whys, all those pathetic romantics who don’t know how and also for those true believers who would read and smile content. If you are a man who is unable to know for sure if you are with your ‘one’, if you would at all find your ‘one’, please get out, because this is not about finding, for this is about keeping your one to yourself. There would be women who would discover themselves in silence after completing the read or some who would plainly call me an ‘ass’, but whatever, I am anyway going to spit out the truth and I know I am right !

Movies are the best place to take your woman to, for they give you countless clues about what she doesn’t mind, can live with, likes, likes a lot, loves, adores, prays for and also prey on. Taking to a movie is not all that easy. You need a lot of thinking to do. What kind of movie? To start with, a comedy would do, slowly into a thriller, a horror (that can be plainly sweaty or a turn on for her), move into a drama, family and finally a tragedy. The first and only thing I would want to say to you is “observe and listen”. The only difference between you and a guy who has had a 50 year old marriage is that you see but he observes, you hear but he listens.

Call them materialistic, every single woman loves gifts. It depends on the individual if it has to be 2 carat hand polished Kimberley diamond or a simple sea shell from Elliot’s beach. Know your woman well before you give her your first ever gift. Women are more prone to sentiments. They remember all ‘firsts’ that you give or have with them. First gift is as important as choosing your first child’s name. Give something that is not perishable, something that is small and pretty. Don’t create too much expectation from their side, for that will happen naturally. You better keep a low profile, be the simple man who can create magic with a smile, a funny guy who knows when to crack a joke, a dependable and thoughtful young man.

Don’t be the jerk that commits too fast and expects the same from her. Committing early is a feminine characteristic. When a woman does it, it reinforces her individuality and displays her genuineness among peers but when a man does it, he’s kind of gay to them. I know it is awfully wrong for them (oops, us :P) to think so, but hey blame the oestrogens dude ! Just let them know you are open for a relationship and shut up. Don’t talk too much about it. Show it in actions like talking about starting a fixed deposit, getting life insurance, I know it sounds very dumb, but it will work to the point where she forgets her teddy and says ‘You’re so cute!’

When it comes to reinforcing belief in her, be the first to tell parents. Volunteer to talk to her parents or support her through the process. Remember Chetan Bhagat, when it comes to Indian woman, when you marry her it means you marry her whole family. Show concern to her by saying and also meaning that her parents are also yours. If you make and stick to your promises (I hear a sigh), she will want you just more.

If the woman you are looking at, is not responding to any of these, buckle up man, she is really not into you. If a woman really likes you, she’ll come up with excuses to see you or praise your ability to chew food as some wonder she has never seen. So quit coming up with stupid lines or smart one-liners. Be the person you are but only more sensible and sensitive.

Rendez-Vous with Ramesh Babu :)

2010-08-26T20:39:00.002+05:30

Hello Mr. Ramesh. Welcome to Rendez-vous with Ramesh Babu.

Ramesh Babu(R)- Is it vous (ou) or vous (oooss)?
Me - You learnt french, did'nt you?
R - Never but a little

Me - How is your new office at Royapuram?
R -incorrigible
Me -Who is you friend at office?
R -Mr.Walker
Me -Is he funny?
R -As funny as bugs bunny hehehe :D

Me-Do you think you are a balanced person?
R -Yes, while sitting in a chair. Otherwise-ovality in center of gravity (சைடு வாங்கறது)

Me -R u interested in crafts?
R- Yes i myself little handicraft (handicapped - translated)

Me -what is your favourite food?
R- plantains. Though i’m not a monkey

Me-what is opinion about your wife?
R-she is very jealous of me
Me- why?
R -I’m more dynamic than her. I am a dynamite.(followed by P.U Chinnappa laugh)

Me- What is favourite movie?
R -Crazy monk drunken monkey. It is based on my life. Both characters.

Me- What is your opinion about your parents?
R- Fruits of the family. Though not fully ripe.

Me- What is your idea about your daughter?
R- Cannot be described in one line. I have to write book of adjectives about fatty and bumpy substances on the world, starting from potato, ending with mount everest.

Me- What is your favourite thing about your mother-in-law?
R -Non stop nonsense. No comments anymore.

Me- Your sisters-in-law (both)?
R -Wind riders of chromepet and saidapet

Me- About your father-in-law?
R- Director of the family

Me -Brothers in law?
First one - உனக்கு ஒண்ணு சொல்றேன் ! ஸ்ரீமான் வேங்கட நாதார்ய...
Second one- firefox

Me- About Kaushik, Adhithya, the Raghavs and Bharathi?
Bharathi- innocent baby
Raghavs-kishkintha men
Kaushik-chakka pradhaman
Adhithya- the fighter jet li

Me- Ok Mr. Ramesh, thank you spending time. We will meet in the next episode soon. Have a good day !

R - It is already night...Zzzzzzzz !
Me - ??????

Love, why are you so sweet !

2010-08-20T10:54:00.003+05:30

What cant your eyes just speak !
What cant your heart just rule !

Where dwelleth you in this vast life ?
Where is the magic coming from, in your smile ?

How do you manage to steal everything in my heart ?
How to do get away with just giving a wink ?

How am I so cute only when I am near you?
How is every cloud shaped like a cupid?

Why is my fluffy teddy bear less cuddly than you?
Why are your sneakers lonely without my sandals?

How come my mirror shows you when I look in?
How come my phone dials only your number?

Why dont you just come?
Why dont I find you soon ?!

மணத்தின் மணம்

2010-07-14T21:21:00.003+05:30

கள்ளூறும் இரவினிலே மல்லிகைப்பூ வாசம் போல்
வருவாய் ! நீ வருவாய் !
நெஞ்சோரம் ஒரு ஆயிரம் சலனம் அதைத்
தருவாய் ! நீ தருவாய் !

விழி வழி தேகம் புகும் உன் எரிமலைப்பார்வை
மனம் கடந்து பரவிய பின் விரல்களின் கோர்வை.
நெடு நேரம் தொடரும் வண்ண வார்த்தைகளின் உலா,
நம்மைக்கண்டு எரியும் அந்த குளிர் வானின் நிலா !
(கள்ளூறும் இரவினிலே)

அந்தி நேரம் வீடு திரும்பும் கணவனின் சட்டை வாசம்,
என் புடவையின் இழை நனைத்து அடுப்படியில் வீசும் !
காலையில் பிரிந்த நம் காலணிகள் கூடும் நேரம்,
உன்னை பார்த்ததும் கண்ணோரம் மகிழ்சிகளின் ஈரம் !
(கள்ளூறும் இரவினிலே)

Second attempt - keeping in mind the songs that appear in tamil films, this piece was written to prove that even delicate emotions could be conveyed subtly and hidden rather than with vulgar words !

கண்ணம்மா - என் காதல் தெய்வம்

2010-07-13T14:29:00.002+05:30

உமிழ் நீர் காய்வதற்குள் ஈரம் தந்தாய்
மனச்சோர்வு அண்டும் முன் நேரில் வந்தாய்
காலங்கள் போனதே உன் நினைவினில் அன்று
சமயம் பார்த்து நகைக்கிறது என் கடிகாரம் இன்று.

பொல்லாத நோய் வந்து விழுந்து போனேன்,
சோர்வாலே தினம் நொந்து ஒடுங்கிப்போனேன்,
வாழ்கையில் தேர்வின்றி தோற்றுப்போனேன்,
மணமாலையில் சேர்வதற்குள் வாடிப்போனேன்.

உன் கடைக்கண் பார்வை பட்ட காற்று போதும்,
என் நெடுநாள் உள்ளக்கடல் நிறைந்து போகும்.
உன் எண்ணங்கள் மனதை அரித்து கொல்லுதடி!
செல்வங்கள் பல இருந்தும், நீயின்றி நான் ஏழையடி!

Debut attempt in tamil poetry writing :) I feel the happiest to have written my first poem in the style of my guru, என் ஆசான் பாரதியார் !

Research is a double-edged sword !

2010-07-10T20:13:00.003+05:30

I know not why, but if there is something that I am extremely proud of and also scared of, it has got to be my research. Well, for the opening line, I'd rather say the positive. Research is such a thrill. It is an elixir that quenches the thirst of an intellectual soul. It has become my constant thought ever since I began, something like a desktop background picture, from the start till shut down of my brain, it is always there at the surface.

The way research has changed my life is something that cannot be just told. It is beyond words to explain the feelings of an experimenting mind, the contented heart of a person who has the freedom to find out the answers of his/her most intriguing question. Though I often wish I should be looking through the microscopic glass to find out hidden facts of life, I now am pursuing masters for the purpose of learning the methodology of research - the whats, hows, whys and wheres of any given research problem. I have promised myself that I would do fundamental research in philosophy for my doctoral dissertation. Philosophy somehow fascinates my mind. The imaginative, in-a-different-world person that I am, I really wish I do life-fulfilling work soon.

Whatever I have learnt in this past 18 months is, Research is not easy. It is a penance. It is an art. It requires the patience that I lack. I am learning it all the hard way, the way that I will never forget. I ask myself- When only I am working on an area that might be useful only to the business community, this process is so tough. How would it be if I want to work on something that would benefit the human race? It is really scary to the tips of blood veins. But, I also think of how it would be if I did complete it. That makes me feel salvation even before it happens.

That is why research is a double-edged sword. The extreme happiness and extreme fear, both can be felt and also simultaneously, when Research is going on !

However, I love it :)

Things to let go..

2010-06-04T18:43:00.002+05:30

Somethings are better left unsaid- What does this statement mean? I really do not know. If there are things to be left unsaid, why do they exist in the first place?

I blog for a reason. I feel, when I say out things that are left unsaid, it relieves me. It also relieves those people who read my blog, who at times have left things unsaid. I do not fear saying the truth nor do I leave things unsaid. I have told people the most wierd of things on the face, be it utter bitterness or heart-melting love. But for the past few days, there has been some instances or people, with whom, I am unable to speak out my heart. I do not want to keep them to myself but there are some strong mental forces(my parents and normalcy), that keep me from speaking. Honestly, last week when I spoke to my paternal grandpa, it was after about 7 years. Haziness and confusion due to self-bloated egos caused a long running family dispute between grandparents and parents. It is very normal for every family to have it, but the extent to which it continued was abnormal. I would not say that my father was completely right, but he was the one who suffered maximum loss ( i am honest). The innumerable times he has spoken to me with a throaty choke, about his parents who are keeping away, still pounds my heart. But last week, all of a sudden, he was pushed to speak to my grandpa. It was a bolted bounce to resume back the relationship. Issues were left unsolved and the relationship started as though new(It reminds me of the punctuated equilibrium model of Change in organizations). I was very uncomfortable to get back to them given the long period of time gap. who would'nt? Situations progressed as though nothing at all had happened and it still is. I have no idea where it will go, either.I wanted to ask - What the hell is happening here?, but I could not. I do not want to be the one who breaks the happiness of a 48 year old son who is speaking to his 70 year old parents after so many years and vice versa.

I just felt like letting it go, say out the unsaid things. " What the hell is happening here? "

I feel relieved !

Money, thou art a heartless bitch !

2010-04-02T20:47:00.004+05:30

I wish I go back to the days when I dint have to manage my pocket, the money I spend and the looking at cruel extremities of the cunning play of money. I see places where money is not valued, people who sweat not being paid well and the cruelness that is befalling those innocent souls who deserve the money they yearn for.

I would not agree to the saying - Money cant but everything in this world, for which I used to be an advocate. After coming across an incident that has disturbed me, I have doubts if money is the 'Satan' described in the Holy Bible or the 'Adharma' of Bhagavad Gita.

Sweat is underrated and not considered plaudible. A man in Muttukadu boat house, who rows a average size boat with 3-4 people for 30 minutes at a stretch, is being paid 20 rupees only and is not even employed permanently by TTDC whereas an auto-rickshaw driver takes 100s of rupees for a 5-6 km ride. How on earth can this be justified? Its all in the hands of the people who pay. Boat-rowing is not an easy job. Physical toil is more and the risk involved is not measureable either. I wish there were people or practices who look into the well being of common men. Government could be more considerate upon people like them, afterall they vote for them too. Being a student of psychology and human resources management, I get raged seeing things like this. I could'nt do anything at that place than give a 100 bucks to that man who rowed my boat. The smile on his face was something precious I earned and I feel it adds to my 'karma'.

Google charms !

2010-03-20T18:32:00.002+05:30

It all started in 1999, when I received it as a gift from my grandfather. He said, 'She told me that all her friends had it and she dint. So I got it'. I felt like a princess after coronation or a nobel laureate after the ceremony, filled with excitement and happiness with blissful smile that never ceased from my lips. I started exploring more and more about it. It was black, sturdy and looked huge. It occupied almost the entire table space pushing all the books to the extreme corner being gigantic, spotless and the wonder that it was. My first computer.

(For the record of it, lets say the computer is a 'she')

She was an artist, an entertainer and sometimes a toughie who would give starting troubles. But the most appealing part of her was this thing called 'internet'. I was confused about what it is, why is it so important and who made it. The one who answered all these questions once and for all was Google. Google has made life simple and mesmerised our minds through its magic interface that starts blank but can take us to a point of amazing leads and paths. A bow to Larry Page and Sergey Brin, who were wonderful visionaries and brilliant strategists.

Personally, I have a soft corner for google. I owe it to google, things that have made me proud like the things that I have created for my school science exhibits, songs I have learnt for my music competitions, ideas I have got for my engineering project and biggest of all, foundation of knowledge that makes me go forward everyday with my masters research.

Not just the ideas and information, Google has brought people closer, made relatives and pals to stay in touch and helped finding long lost friends ( Balu Uncle stands testimony to this sentence). Google, being such a strong medium of affect on people's life, it deserves a blog post !

Google, I applaud you ! I owe you big time !

Slums of Chennai and SunDirect subscription

2010-02-03T20:50:00.004+05:30

The sight was incredible. A 12 car electric multiple unit(sub-urban train) rambling on the steel bars unsupported by earth underneath, dark n smelly water running alongside dwelling units, roofs of asbestos and brick lined mud walls for protection, there is the slum of Chennai near Numgambakkam. Apart from the unhygeinic surroundings and noise of livelihood, what is common among these huts?
The sun above their roofs and the Sun Direct dish antennas. Quite an alarming surprise, isnt it?

None of the 'machans' of the houses there, have permanent jobs and it doesnt affect their style of life much. Free colour television sets from the government is a big relief to their boring day of 'sitting idle'. The major work of the slum-dwellers, is not rag-picking or drainage un-clogging, as one might miscalculate. It is sub-letting their dwelling units given by the Slum Clearance Board, to office goers who have migrated from towns and villages. Some women of the slums involve themselves as household maids in the neighbouring flourishing areas such as Sterling road, Mehta nagar, Kilpauk, etc, where also, there are houses with Sun Direct dish antennas.

What is the after-band of all these happenings?
Two children from these slums will become famous artists and get to see the next year's Oscar award ceremony after the making of Slumdog Millionaire-Reloaded.

Warm relationships

2010-01-07T18:51:00.004+05:30

Here I am to write about few very warm people of my life, who, at one point or the other touched my life and soul and made me better in every dimension of living !

Every single human loves to be in a warm relationship, where one can experience the feeling of sleeping under the stars or having a bubble bath or scalp massage or wearing comfortable clothing. The feeling of warmth is actually much more that all of these put together. It differs from person to person and with whom the relationship is.

Moms are the best in the world. My mom is no exception to it. Unconditional love, unstoppable care, unending worries about me and unbeatable tasty dishes are just wow. When I am away from home, I miss those the most. She asks a 100 times if I am hungry or had snacks in the evening, buys donuts for me on the way back home from work, takes care of my hair and does everything that I'm either lazy to do or dont take much care of. Such is my amma. Ma, I love you !

Dads are regarded as the symbols of strictness. I do agree. But my dad is different. He is the funniest dad anyone can see. Being it pulling my leg along with my friends who visit or his "I am ur baby brother" dialogues, it is just so hilarious. Which over-sized dad acts like a Mr.Universe contestant and does muscle-tough postures for you to shoot videos? My dad does. Even if I scratch my finger off with a hair clip, he runs for a band-aid. Such is my appa. Pa, I love you !

Friend ! I am smiling big when I write about my friend. Why? Cuz, What I dint even share with such wonderful parents, I have shared with my best friend. Vatsa ! Who would get all my scoldings when I am stressed out and angry, even when he knows that the mistake is not his? Only he will. My soulmate. My life's light and what not? People like him are so hard to find or may be he is so, only to me, I dunno. Such is my soulmate. Bachu, I love you !

If at all, I am given a chance to decide my next birth, I would want the same parents and I would want vatsa as my son !

Husband - ?! (gap to be filled in later :P )

There are numerous friends who have been with me through thick and thin.I love them all.Very much and will continue to !

Aish :)

Be hidden or eaten?

2009-12-09T18:34:00.002+05:30

Its a blood-sucking world out there. There are more harmful than harmless people who are living there. What I mean by harmful also includes those who harm the mental health of us. Physical pressures and wounds are much easier totake, I would say. Fortunately or to be specific, luckily I did not have any such people around me. So are you lucky, if so. Not everyone gets such a life, you see.

The 'harmful' people that I refer to in here, are not only those criminals who force women and children in brothel or blind the men and kids for beggary. They are in the form of people who are near you, watching you, following like shadow and would do anything to keep you under them. In few cases that I have heard, they're even ruthless parents causing a son's heart to ache, or a friend who has ripped his buddy off, backbiting or a boss paiting with crap on his colleague's shirt. So unfortunate of those who turn victims to them, the simple reason being the ignorance of the harm that those people could cause. We pass off saying "Its my fate".

Its not your fate !! Wake up !

How do you get to identify those subtly 'harming' people?

That's were the concept of "Be hidden or eaten" helps. Those 'harmful' people can be pointed out easily. They are like water of the shower. The road is covered with water when it rains. If the roads are little rugged, water fills the 'downs' and crevices. If the road is too smooth, the water erodes away the softer parts.

These people are like those waters. When they know that you are quite rough,they try to hide your flaws,only to blackmail you later to expose them. If you are too nice and innocent, the erode your heart and leave marks forever. They just eat away the nicer portions of you.

Just imagine, how would you feel to be such a road? pretty bad right?

What you have to be right now is an ocean. Be unpredictable but be full of possibilities. Be quiet on the inside and but do not forget to make waves on the outside. All what I am trying to say is, Be friendly but not let others control you. Keep people guessing what your next step is. This way, the ocean can swallow any amount of rain waters, immaterial of how powerful their currents are :)

Vows and Rings !

2009-11-21T18:51:00.004+05:30

There is a story that I would like to share. It goes....

"

Arti and Ram (names changed) were sitting on a park bench, sliding casually in their jogging track pants and tees. The dawn was quite pleasant on their eyeballs, bringing thin smoke-less breeze to their humid neckline.The grey-haired heroes were walked by their fluffy,brown-haired four-leggers on the pavement, whilst Arti and Ram started to talk.

Arti : Last night's party was really good. It brought back so many good memories to me. I got reminded of Sam when I saw you hitting on that brunette with your facial charms :D Sam is so like you.He was flirtarious. But cant blame you. the brunette was quite a chick.

Ram : As if you dint quite look at some roosters there.. You're a secret agent in these matters. I noticed your 'innocent enquiries' about the pyjama dude to Rekha. Whats that about now? :P

Arti : I knew you would keep an eye on me, you little rascal.Who's the secret agent actually?

Ram : Well Well, I have to keep an eye to make sure you are alright with your childish coke cans :P

Arti : How mean! Why would urge me to try a beer? Let it go with you.

Ram : Ok ! OK ! Lets switch the talk. Whats the plan for today? Shall we go meet Sam? You've been wanting to meet him since last week....

"

The story seems irrelevant to the topic heading right? But it isnt all that inappropriate.

Arti and Ram are man and wife. The conversation is so breezy, noone would have quite thought so. Vows and marriage exchanges are not expressed just by rings or chains worn by either of them but they are exchange of simplicity and originality of both of them. Jealosy and doubt are the two devils of a relationship. The bond of friensdhip between the couple kills both the devils. Why is that, it is still not practised?

The day when you see a friend in your partner, is the day of eternal happiness !

Isnt it ??

One night of lonely cry

2009-10-26T13:23:00.003+05:30

Platform of heat that boils the kiln,
Neatness of empty heart fighting to fill,
Eating the fire of lull, dark and disgust,
Moving on forming steel with baby pink cheeks.

Shouting and daring for roughness within,
Cleaning the tears with thorny white tissues,
Blood on the chin and wear on the skin,
Cant hold on the pain of crushing myself.

Dark scratches of maroony rivers - Cracking
Into the subtle face of loneliness.
Creepy shadows can come and scare - When
Noone watches, I cry for more care.

Magic number 3 !

2009-09-05T09:27:00.006+05:30

I've been thinking about certain things or unpleasant happenings I may say, that I wanted to blog about. I had the feeling that they are too personal or something that would not be a blog-material. But now I say, "Who cares? and I definitely don't !". Blogging actually gives me a sense of relief and that was the reason why I chose to do it.And now, I'm going to get rid of the strings attached to my heart, brain or whatever and feel new !

When I first entered college, a fantasy that each one of us had during the initial college period, struck me too. MOBILE PHONE fantasy !!Absolute necessity(now I do not feel so), close connectivity and staying in touch were the 'mantras'. Long hours of talking to friends, hundreds of text messages and non-stop music through headsets were the 3 most important duties of each day.That was when, I got introduced to this person, say No.1(name changed to number) through another friend.I have not met him, nor do I know anything of him and still why was I talking to him? Because,in the first ever sms that was exchanged, he said I would be a sister to him.'Brothers' are my weaknesses(they used to be my strengths earlier) cuz I do not have one and I always wanted one who would play,pull my hair,tease but still love me.Since this No.1 had coincidentally said the 'word', I felt I should talk to him and so I did.The friendship grew and became brotherhood after the first raksha bandhan.He helped me a lot on certain important issues and I was with him through all his problems.Suddenly, a break ! Now,for the past 2 yrs we don't talk.Shedding my ego, I called him and mailed him but there's still no reply. Now, I have decided, there's a limit for everything and this is it. I still have no clue of why all this happenned or what is the reason behind his silence.(a little unbelievable right?it is the truth and can I be more stupid?)

Another incident was during the 3rd yr of college. After I sang in college band, I was approached by a person and he congratulated me for my singing.He is No.2.I cannot understand if it was so cliche or fateful that, he also called me 'sister'.(Am I the best sister-figure or what?)Anyway, this relationship also started blossoming and around a year later, one day, there was no news of him.As usual, I tried contacting and in vain.What is my luck !! Out of the blue, he appears a few months later and by then, I had started losing faith on him or his brotherly bond and so I could not get back to him with the same affection I used to have.

The next incident is something that has left a deep impact on me.He is No.3 and is the reason why I started feeling too bad that I do not have a brother. He's my cousin.We were separated due to a family dispute and had lost each other since the age of 13(he was 8 then).he is such an adorable child and we were like inseperable.Until the age of 17 or 18, I suffered a lot without being able to talk to him.I dint know where he was or what he was doing.Almost all my very close school friends know about how much I missed him.On one lucky day, I found his cousin(my 2nd cousin) on Orkut(i was thankful then but now I dont have comments) and she told me that he is in the city and gave his phone number. I called and spoke, he was jus the same old little baby, but only he was taller than me.The happiness was broght back and revived with sharing each others' stories that we have missed being through. Now, you would have guessed it right. We dont talk.He has been behaving wierd and I guess his parents do not want him to talk to me.I still have his number and he has mine,I have doubts(about what is happening) and he has inhibitions !

These 3 incidents have made me feel a lot otherwise about brotherhood.People who know me very well, would be taken by surprise reading the previous sentence, because they all know how much I loved all my brothers.I am probably the only person who has had 3 failed brotherly relationships.

But I have to admit, I still love all of them.They have all changed my lives in some way or the other, by adding value when they were with me and by teaching lessons when they were not.

Aish....

Be a gal !

2009-08-24T19:00:00.003+05:30

This sure is the "sentence" I have heard most, from parents, grandparents, uncles and aunts who all are the 'pro-conventionals'.

What is waering gold jewels got to do with being a gal? Or what is the connection between forthright talking and being a gal?

If there is...I have to accept, I am not a gal...very much not !

Born to parents of a considerably good education, mom being a graduate and dad a post-graduate, I get questions like - 'Why are you not wearing a bright bindi?(conventionally kumkum), Why are you taking off ur earrings at night?'

Give me a break !

Why the bloody hell am I gettin to answer such questions?

'Dont let your hair loose' is another common 'hearing'. (Damn !!)

People say 'women are in forefront, developped and so modern' and those people according to me are 'plain stupid'. People who really feel so, never keep talking about it. People who talk are still backward in thoughts, buried deep into the core of meaningless conventions,I'd say, all parents are no exception to it. Dads say 'Indra Nooyi is a wonder woman' and moms say 'Padma Subramaniam is a treat for the eyes'. Grandparents praise Bombay Jayasree for her divine singing. But do any of them allow their daughter or grand daughter to take up music, dance, arts, theater or civil aviation as their career? """"NO""""

People who talk loud do not necessarily speak truth. Silimarly, people who get to make our decisions, do not get to choose the right or the best, and by that I mean allowing to "pursue the passion". Now that has become a swear word.I'm not being a gal !!

Today, I'm doing what I like a lot.Research is my liking but definitely not my ambition.One day, when the ambition turns true, atlest then, the conventions would take a back seat.

"பெண்ணுக்குள் ஞானத்தை வைத்தான் புவிப்பேணி வளர்த்திடும் ஈசன்.
மண்ணுக்குள்ளே சில மூடர் நல்ல மாதர் அறிவை கெடுத்தார்."

With a lot of deep thinking,
Aish.

Being on the other side of the coin

2009-08-07T11:40:00.003+05:30

A coin sure has two sides.A head and a tail.Bright and dark.giving end and receiving end.black and white.
Similarly, there also exists a 'promiser end and disapponted end', which everone would agree to because there would have been atleast one instance where each one of us would have been on the 'disappointed' end.
Situations of awkward inconvenience that push the alloted time further away from the schedule or even erase it off from minds and push the inhabitant of left chest area into despair, giving deep throated, choking breathlessness is something that does not spare any human being(if you know what I mean).
Far-reached people giving baseless words that finally vanish away into thin air, can thrust the minds into dark space for hours.
Sleepless nights, withered flowers on the coffee table left uncghanged due to lost thoughts, sloppy clothing alternately buttoned, fixed eyeballs failing to blink, glowing indicator on the automobile even after turning to the right, failing to notice the seating space in a crowded train--such abnormal happenings would help identify a 'disappointed' in a mass.
Being on this dark side of the coin is never a wanted option to anyone but noone excepts it is the truth.

Have you ever?

2009-07-10T10:17:00.004+05:30

Have you ever fallen into a dustbin while playing with your new toy, as a kid?

I have !

Have you ever had a crush on a guy when you were 3 and worn a "HE and SHE" t shirt with him?

I have !

Have you ever been poked in your eye by a duck's beak?

I have been !

Have you ever covered yourself in a blanket and scared the street dogs at midnight?

I have !

Have you ever accidently emptied your water bottle on a friend's head not knowing she is inside a bush playing 'hide and seek' and got tight slap from class teacher in 1st standard?

I have !!

Have you ever played a part of a male freedom fighter in a stage drama(me being a gal) just because you were well built and taller than all other guys in school?

I have !

Have you ever tried balancing a bicycle just on wheels, sitting on it and not resting your feet on the floor and fell on a motorcyclist nearby on the road who told you "enna velayadariya ma?"?

I have !

Have you ever been to a restaurant,eaten full stomach and found no money in the wallet, then pledged your friends at the counter and gone home to bring money?

I have !!

Have you ever spat gum on someone trying to blow out a bubble?

I have !

Have you ever spoken to a drunkard (when he is still drunk) about insurance and convinced him to get one?

I have !

Have you gone walking at 5.30 am on a sunday morning with a half dozen 60 year olds and a boxer dog, talking to them about forensic biology when you are just 13?

I have !

Have you ever worn a pant inside out and went to an event as a judge?

I have ! (someone even found out and made it a fashion statement)

Have you ever gone into on roller coaster ride and then got down before it began, others thinking that you were afraid, but actually the reason was that you sat on someone else's puke?

I have !

Have you ever been to a betrothal where you went ahead of the bride and groom, waited for a hour and then came back leaving a note at the reception table?

I have !! (tis was yesterday)

More to come, perhaps !!

Aish :)

Waaaannnnnn...mummmmmyyyyyy !!

2009-06-11T14:10:00.003+05:30

Calvin (of Calvin and Hobbes) : I think I should stay home from school.I've got a sore throat, an ear ache, a stomach ache. I'm seeing spots and I'm dizzy.

Calvin's mom : I'll call the doctor.

Calvin : Hold on,I think its all clearing up.Yes! I think I'm better now.

: Its pretty hard to hit that magic number of appropriately vague,mildly
serious but not quite worrisome symptoms.

While reading this page of the comic, I found it compelling to blog after a really long break.

School days were awesome, chirpy periods of wonder and fun.every kid would have cried on monday mornings to get ready to school.But do parents observe keenly , the reasons they give,Most parents miss out the lovely lies that the little ones say to keep away from school.In managing office and home, parents dont get the time to enjoy these small lovable happenings.

Little Aarthi of play school says- "My maths miss is teaching wrongly.after seventy,eighty,ninety,she is saying something "hunder".is it not tenty?i dont want to go to her class.

While Parthiv of UKG 'B' section is complaining about english teacher.He wrote-there are "mouses" in my rooom and his english miss gave him only 9/10, 1 mark less than his next seat gowtham.

The cases of kindergarten darlings being so, their parents say they dont have time to talk to their kids.

I feel everyone is missing out great things that are naturally available but complain about practical truth and work pressure blaming that there are only 24 hours in a day.

Who are the kids now? :))

Mitafest Memories Unlimited

2009-02-20T09:59:00.003+05:30

The oldest inter college cultural festival - The Mitafest is happening and it brings to me tonnes of very sweet memories as I was associated with it for 4 splendid years-not only from the spectator side but also being a part of the organizers and performers.

I remember those walks from south(main) gate to hangar or CRR OAT or Rajam hall in the late evenings when the sun would still be there but the rays would go unnoticed due to the serial lighting on the numerous trees in the campus.The cool breeze that causes the eyes to water when sitting in the gallery is a thing to rejoice.Those senior-junior talks near the stalls,the senior guys used to 'fry nuts' with the junior gals and eat icecreams on their mess account,the so-called guys who always complain that MIT figures are bad(what can they expect from nerds?afterall MIT gets only them not the style gals like ethiraj or MOP)would be sitting on PT bund looking around the registration desk for some refreshing sights.

My first Mitafest in 2005 february was just about getting to know of it from the gallery's side.The unstoppable whistling I did alond with Deepu is still so memorable since we were the only 2 who could whistle from the gals side.Dr.Thamilporai spotted us whistling n thus my thermodynamics grade went to a 'C'(tats MIT !! :P still no regrets)

My 2nd edition was in march 2006 in which I was one of the (fine)artists for decorating the stage and floor in hangar.Those days with so many good-hearted senior frens like Suresh kumar aka puli,anjana aka singam,late ms.Rama aka auto,sathya,prathi n many more was like a golden period of happiness.Rangoli and fabric painitng actually took a back seat when we got together,talked and smiled n laughed and sang during those 7 days of preparation.

Then came the brightest of all my four Mitafest experiences,in february 2007.That was a season of brightness,joy,fun,wonder,glitz and togetherness.I performed as a singer along with Ashwin.Man,those practice sessions were just awesome.Vimal,Ram,Ranjith,Nivas,Sridar,Ashwin and me used to jus while away time in the orchestra room :P thinking of it makes me so happy.It can never come back,such a wonderful experience which had fights,misunderstandings,appreciations,encouragement,disturbance and of course a lot of music.I have to mention here all those people who made my life at MIT so rich n colorful during music sessions.Divya snr,Kartik snr,Vichu snr,Sethu snr,Sreeni snr,Saranya snr,Ashwath,Vindhya,B2,Raj,Shriram,Srinath,,Neeraja,LG Bala n many more.To end this paragraph would be so difficult cuz that is the bonding I shared with MIT n all of them.

The final Mitafest was the one which had lots of deep feelings for all of the final yr students(since it was their last edition) and so it was enjoyed to the fullest.Rain did not dampen the spirits but made the whole scenario very beautiful and poetic.what I enjoyed witnessing the most was the Just A Minute(JAM) at rajam hall,everyone who was there would agree to it.It was jus superb.I also enjoyed walking in the rain,chatting with friends and juniors in the hangar in the afternoons when there were no events scheduled.Those plastic chairs would miss all of us and I do really miss the tall heights of asbestos covered hangar,the yellow flowers fallen on the roads,the voices from registration desk and music dedications from juke box but all the memories embedded in my heart would speak of Mitafest until I live.

Ammuvagiya naan

2009-01-19T09:24:00.007+05:30

There are incidents,happenings and memories in life that are so beautiful that they remind us to be happy.The happiness that they bring to us is just priceless.Childhood memories are those that are ranked first in the list of 'make-us-happy' kind of things.

Long long ago,around 15 years ago,when ammu was 6 or 7 yrs old,she used to spend time at her granny's place where her cousins,kaush,adhi,bobby stayed and where her two other cousins yogi and jundu used to come to play everyday.They played all day during summer vacation-ludo,hop and catch,names and hide and seek.Each one was younger to one another by a matter of an year and so they gelled well.Kids they were and so ego dint find a place.Ammu was a sole child for her parents and so loved being with her cousins.When her dad used to pick her up in the evening to take her home,she dint cry but she felt so bored and down.Nevertheless,the thought of coming back next morning was always there to add cheer.

Ammu had two more cousins-bhar and sup who were in the high streets of the city and they too joined the kids gang during summer holidays.Altogether,they were 7...may be the "SUPER SEVEN".Kaush being the eldest of all,had his own ways of getting things done.He bullied bhar most of the time as she was so quiet and sensitive kid.Adhi was a hero kind who employed terrorism with the other kids of his age and threatened yogi all time though yogi was elder to him by 4 months.Jundu was a separate kind,youngest of all,gets everything by crying for it(ammu's dad named him 'sruthi box' because of his non-stop crying).Bobby was another typical character who doesn talk much but she plays with everyone.Sup was a like bhar's twin,as she was raised along with her.Ammu was neither silent nor chatter-box.She liked everyone as she always felt that she doen have anyone back home.

So many incidents to cherish had happened those days-boys vs. girls cricket where mama played for girls so that they dont cry losing,watched hum aapke hain koun in theater as a big gang-those days they never understood the dialogues also but it still remains their favorite movie,trip to crocodile bank,boating and golden beach-eating the king size family dosa,the best of all would be when all of them used to visit bhar's house.Ammu's perima had great liking for kids(tho they are noisy and difficult to control),she used to keep them at her home for days-a big circle of kids sitting around her and she gives them food in their hands,one by one,but for jundu alone she feeds(which kaush will oppose saying he licks her hands).The girls used to bathe together as one group and boys as one group together(chennai kutralam it was).The story continued but sudeenly the kids grew up.They dont play anymore nor do they spend time together during summer.Each one is busy withe their lives,jobs,education.Bhar is getting married soon and may be that occasion would bring them all together again.

Waiting in anticipation,
Ammu.

UPDATE ON AUGUST 24TH 2009,
Ammu and all her cousins had a reunion after about 10 years.The much expected sweet-cute-happy meeting :)

From left to right-Jundu,Sanj,Raghav,Kaush,Adhi,Sup,Ammu and Bhar :)

The "MISSED CALL" phenomenon

2008-12-17T19:02:00.002+05:30

How well can a person manage his expenditure these days?—
1. Avoiding pizzas and eating dosas.
2. Playing cricket in the school ground nearby rather than snooker or bowling.
3. Keeping away from girls :P
4. The ‘missed call’ technique.

Whether or not the first 3 are practised, the last option sure is. Wherever and whenever, your phones come handy (whether there is enough talk value or previous bill paid is immaterial), this ‘missed call’ thingy has become a culture these days. I’m not in any way criticizing but instead enumerating certain instances FOR this incredible trend.

Being at home or office or INOX, this little ‘missed call’ world is always around to help. You need not ever strain typing a text or calling up to your dad saying you are safe but this ‘MC’(not to be mistaken with alcoholic stuff) is sufficient to convey. No electronics engineer would have imagined that there would be such an innovation in this world of communication and no service provider could ever ban it for their incurred losses.

If we all could make a small peep into the future, may be your house maid would give you an ‘MC’ to say she’s taking a day off or ‘MC’ could even intrude into the space science, for the astronaut to convey to the ground officials that he’s landed in the mars. Who knows if this can’t happen? You can never presume. The only way to be happy is to just say thanks to your mobile phone and cheers to Mr.A.G.Bell for not making the first ever call a ‘MISSED CALL’.

The sense of belonging

2008-12-16T11:00:00.000+05:30

Way into life and its paths, each one loves to be loved, loves to be secure, love to belong to someone. There would be no one who would nod a NO to this. Each soul loves be protected and pampered by another. And this is what is achieved by best means such as parenting, friendship and marriage-all 3 being forms of expression of love.

Love, personally I feel, is such a medicinal feeling that casts a spell on each one who knows what it is and cares what it does and does not mean to themselves and to whom they love. The answer to every interrogation ends in love and its very many kinds of expressions. Out of all these, the sense of ‘belonging’ serves the best.

Problems at and away from home are all spades that tend to bruise the little heart of each one of us. Most of the domestic problems that arise out of misunderstanding, ego and differences of opinion can be sorted out jus by these words-“I will never hurt you because you are mine”. The magic that these words create knows no bounds. The happiness it brings to the then bruised heart is priceless. The daddy who said-shut up to you would say-its okay. The friend who said-give me a break would say-come on cheer up. Are these not enough to keep you going?

The same would apply at office desks too. When you feel like I don’t care, why not change it to- This is my place. The sense of belonging to your workplace is a factor that multiplies the output of your work. The pride you get in wearing your company’s logoed tee sets you high of the development scale.

So….why don’t we try this?

The killer called 'ANGER'

2008-11-14T12:56:00.004+05:30

The caption itself would have meant something to few people.Well...it is indeed bout anger and related unpleasant expressions that find part of our lives and adds nothing but discontent to us. Anger is something that, I personally have overcome by myself, the moment I left school. I thought it was a silly experiment with ourselves knowing not to produce fruitful results.Then why carry them out?

Anger is something that ruined many people's life and that is encircling and haunting some of ours too.I read a small story whcih really moved me.You read it too and then see where your anger vanishes.But remember to remind yourself about this story whenver you get angry.

-------the story-------

There lived a family of 3-dad,mom and small kid who lived by the countryside.The dad had a business and mom was a cook. The kid was a kindergarten-doll.She was the most cute kid of the village.One day, all of a sudden, the dad's business was shattered and he was in a position to sell all his shares to come out of his debts.

When he returned home,he was all alone,his wife had gone for work and the kid in school.Then, one of his old friends, who had lent some cash long ago,came in and shouted and abused him for not returning the money.He then said,he'll take the dad's car in place of the money and said he'l drive it on his way back home.The dad started washing the car when the kid arrived.

It was playing near her dad while the dad was shouting to himself in anger and out of frustration.He suddenly heard screeching sounds on the other side of the car and found it to be the kid writing on the door of the car with rusted nails. He beat the kid hard on her little hands with the shovel he had and thrashed the tiny girl.The kid bled badly and was hospitalised.The physicians then told the dad-"Sir, we're sorry.You're kid has lost all the fingers cuz the shovel you used had pointed ends".

The dad was so trembling with fear and returned home and was sitting on the garden bench.Then what he saw, took him to the pinnacle of guilt.On the car, the little girl had written- I LOVE YOU DADDY. He burst into tears and cried hard for days thinking of his cruel act out of anger.

------end of story-----

Try to bring this story to your mind whenver you are angry and you would also surely overcome your anger.

WHEN YOU ARE AWAY...

2008-10-30T11:29:00.002+05:30

Those still moments of the day, those lifeless melted minutes of distant thoughts and those standstill frames of togetherness are all going to find episodes in the chapter of my life. The wondrous times of friendship and bonding that I had captured through your grape eyes are still longing to get printed in the epic of our lives filled with warmth but you had been destined to move towards your career in a land of thundering storms and cold but little it is evident that it is not only the climate that experiences hurricanes but also the houses of auricles and ventricles inside me in where you are kept secure all life.

How could the sweetest of life turn into a tormenting fire all of a sudden? In this place of love, I would never allow the wide mouthed dragon of lull find its place. In the heart that you live in, there would be no grief, no fright, no pressure and not even the slightest thought of separation because I know they would suffocate you.

Instead, I would think of the times of happy walking holding each others’ hands, talking about our liking for the rain, enjoying a sip of cold juice along the roadside shop and belittling each others’ worries to a grain. These memories, forever will bring joy to my being even when you are away physically because friendship is a beautiful feeling that can be smiled at and welcomed wherever we are, which no other relationship can.

My lovely soul mate, there are just not things that would remind me of you, but you and your memories remind me of my life. You are the best ever friend. When you are away, I would greatly miss you but hoping and praying for you to come back soon.

Come back soon..
Aish.

Tuesday,I'm so busy..

2008-09-16T15:08:00.003+05:30

Memories bleed from nowhere inside,
Into the bowl of soupy stories made.
Forget the bright silve spoon that fed,
Now there's not even a hand that cared.

I'm sunk in despair.today is one o d few days wer I feel everything hates me n I don have a rason to live.I kno each o us would've felt tis way atleast once.I've had 3 continuous sleepless nights n now feel like nobody in this place.Every place I see seems lifeless and dull.Every person who talks to me sounds boring.Every thing I see looks evil laughing at me.

There's something that I'm misssing badly,like something that I always want has vanished and somethin which is my life-line has beeen cut off.A feeling of breathlessness haunts my inside even wen strong breeze blows on my face.I feel dead and emotionless,sad n totally unlike me.Each cell is crying n each hair is shivering.

I wish I go to some far off place sans humans wer tho noone wud care but noone wud hurt.I wish I fly away from here tho I wud miss my dearmost but I would never have the feeling that he doesn miss me cuz I'M GONE.

Bye n in deep darkness,
me.

New place but who cares....

2008-08-19T18:43:00.002+05:30

Its been long since i blogged.I jus thought with what i can fill the space n suddenly remembered that I've joined a new course n coll n can scribble something bout the experiences der..

U cant find a calm place at the heart of the city like tis one...people here n der filling spaces..people of different mindsets..from who throw attitude even at d first meet n to the most humble souls..let me stop here before any kinda reader-found-criticism creeps in(who knows who'll read tis!!)

Moving into pedagogy, I must say, being the first in its kind in south india, I kinda expected some standard..still i'm not disappointed n let me end it der too(who knows if a spy would read tis :P)

I really do not have real things to pen down bout the place...still i found a small group of like-mindeds n a nice bro.I'm thankful...pheww..may be i should give some time for everything to settle n get its shape..let me wait..

Signing off for now :)
tata :))

One day in the life of missing the dearMOST

2008-07-10T12:03:00.004+05:30

There are things in life we miss in every phase- childhood, school,college, old toys and lost age. Some, we can get over and go on as we find satisfaction in the newcomers in our lives but one that is irreplaceable is the love of the dearmost friend. You miss him in everything you see or do.

When my tongue could feel the flowing pulp of mango in the numbness of morning fog, at the breakfast table, I said to myself- he loves mango, I miss him. Thinking of how much he means to me and driving to work, I again drift back to the days of long drives with him and making up our sweaty foreheads in the rear view mirror before posing for a photograph.

I was hungry. Taking time off to eat in a restaurant but “the feeling” did not spare me even there. Those snack hours we spent sharing pizzas, I drew saucy smileys on his bread potato cheese toast, tasting everything new on the menu card, everything I missed. Now, I miss him more. There’s nothing left except the ‘bill’ with a print ‘toast Rs30’ and a hand written statement by me ‘Its just me alone this time’.

Returning home and dropping dead on the couch, I felt weirder. Sipping the coffee, standing on the terrace, I missed him even more. I looked at my left hand. The fingers were jus 5 but not 10, just bare but not accompanied and just freezing missing his warmth. Sunk in despair, lodging a wandering mind in my skull, I could not be less anxious.

My phone kept beeping, the blood in my veins would not permit me to move, as he occupied my thoughts, my mind could not send signals to my hand to reach the phone at once. Not only the coffee, even my heart grew colder.
The phone rang. “Hey baby, I’m back” were the words I heard and I said to myself – “ I’m back too, to my normality, at last” and I said to him – “Hey I missed u big time “.

Why should'nt I expect?

2008-07-05T09:02:00.003+05:30

Every morning starts with an anticipation of the day going well. We say – “let the day be happy and let me complete my work without any obstacles and earn a good name at work. Let me have a good lunch, fun time with friends and at last a good night’s sleep”.
This is what everyone wishes to and do we call them ‘expectations’??

No, we don’t call them expectations. But why? Of course they are also expectations.
We expect the life, the fate to give us all good, is it not absurd when we surely know we are going to get only what we have to get? But still some divine heads say they do not expect anything from anyone. Well, this blog is to reflect how should one turn their expectations into fruitful issues.

Last night, something I expected did not happen (after all it was a small thing and it was silly for me to have expected it) but that made me think what expectations can do and how can they be diverted into a good form to bring constructive thoughts in an individual (again the psychology comes in).

It is surely not bad to expect things. But it is surely bad to expect out of the way of the things that cannot happen at all in any way. Such things not only hurt but also diminish the positive energy in you. It can drive you crazy, make you lose people and at last result in an emotional, uncontrollable outburst. Why should we, mature individuals let it happen? Don’t we have self-control? Yes, we do. But we do not know when exactly to employ that self-control. That is every human’s problem, even mine. It is really very easy for me to write but so damn difficult to practise. But still I write just because I feel that I try to follow my writings.

There are ways that we can use to divert our expectations towards our development and that is to ‘expect more from yourself’. Ask questions to yourself as to how much should you improve on your work so that you are a better professional at work or a better son/daughter at home or just a better human being. Such expectations never hurt, I promise. They can make you many more folds better and productive. They give you a renewed enthusiasm to look forward at life’s path and makes you the architect of your own world in you and around you.

So, to sum it up, so as contrary to all other writers, I’d say ‘EXPECTATION SKILLS, COMPLACENCY KILLS’.

This beautiful song called FRIENDSHIP...

2008-06-10T14:30:00.005+05:30

Who all have heard it or hummed this song?? You have any idea how to sing it? Well if you dont, never worry...this is one song you can sing however you please n still be assured that someone is always listening...

Listeners change when the song tranforms from a teen pop to a melodoius country classic of 20s or from lullabies to lil hip hop...you cant say who, but only those who have some waves catch on with your song..there can be only few who are tuned to yours forever n you're lucky if keep them listening n u always like wat they sing for u...

This is quite rare...that is to have someone up there with you,wen u sing or smile or cry or laugh or light up or break down...not just a pair of ears that keep on listening, but a pair of eyes with so much love which says, "you just need yourself, eveything else is with me"...not just a pair of lips to sing for you back, but a little heart that worries wen you're down n is happy for you wen you're successful...which has the power to communicate through eyes.This is rare, isnt it?

I am so happy I have a friend like that...a fountain of friendship at the centre of a garden of happiness beneath the sky of warmth and clouds of light pouring tonnes of love drops on me...am i personifying? not a bit...who can get someone like my lil sweetest friend?

Now jus don call me lucky....I'm blessed n he's my preecious !!

--Aish--

A loving dedication to my sweetest n best friend ever, dear cute VATSA :) baby....I love you the most.. :)

From Shelly's I dedicate to you...

Thou Friend, whose presence on my wintry heart
Fell, like bright Spring upon some herbless plain;
How beautiful and calm and free thou wert
In thy young wisdom, when the mortal chain
Of Custom thou didst burst and rend in twain,
And walked as free as light the clouds among,
Which many an envious slave then breathed in vain
From his dim dungeon, and my spirit sprung
To meet thee from the woes which had begirt it long!

No more alone through the world's wilderness,
Although I trod the paths of high intent,
I journeyed now: no more companionless,
Where solitude is like despair, I went.−−
There is the wisdom of a stern content
When Poverty can blight the just and good,
When Infamy dares mock the innocent,
And cherished friends turn with the multitude
To trample: this was ours, and we unshaken stood!

TRIBUTE OR DEDICATION-CALL IT WHATEVER

2008-05-27T12:33:00.004+05:30

My mind wanders, in search of some peace n some soothing medicine...here i found some...some good memories that are magical n medicinal.

Date- someday in my first semester.
Place- College bus en route to an orphanage.

Conversation 1

Ms.R- hey junior, ingae vaa...paer enna?
me- my name is Aishwarya...snr.
Ms.R-T.number enna?
me- 20043602 snr..
Ms.R- Unoda senr yaaru?
me- Anantha snr..
Ms.R- OH anantha ah???super appo neeyum padips ah? seri seri unoda t.numbera tamil la sollu pakkalam...(laughs)
me- snr....therila snr...(blinking)
Ms.R-hmmm....paravala...naalaiku hostel ku vaa...pesalam.

Day-next day
Place-Ladies hostel main block.Room 1101.

Ms.R-hey jun..paravallaye...kupta udane vanduta...seri una pathi sollu..
me-(speak speak breathe speak laugh breathe smile handshake speak n stop at last)
Ms.R- hey sathya ponnu nalla peasaraa ila...ido paru jun naan ragging lam pannala...jolly a pesu ena?
me- seri snr...thnx...tata :)

This was how it started way back in 2004.Ms.R mentioned here was such a lovable n loving senior in college.2 years senior to me, she was much like an elder sister, fun loving friend and wonderful companion during the YRC camp in first year.

I have had so much fun n good times with her n her friends during mitafest,sivaranjani n in hostel room 1101, eating lunches together, laughin away, pulling each others' legs n she has even fed me. Such was the bond that we shared. Even wen she used to visit college after passing out, we hanged out together sometime. Those days, I never ever imagined she would leave us all n leach heaven so soon. What a disaster!!

I wish n pray sincerely that her soul rests in peace.

Dear auto(tats her pet name)...I will never forget you n ur wonderful smile.

No Reason

2008-05-08T20:59:00.001+05:30

One day, when i felt so lonely and pressuried, some scribblings i made, which goes like.....

Why are the angels skipping my head?
Why are the bees stinging my heart?
Why are my eyes drowning in tears?
Why are my withered lips bleeding?

Why am I ringing thorns on my skin?
Why am I pouring ale over my burns?
Why am I suffocating my soul?
Why am I brooding over nothing?

The space gets tighter as time goes on,
The beat gets heavier, though empty it is.
There is no reason or blame or way,
Lo! I am just one of the equals by say.

My very own MIT

2008-03-16T19:27:00.000+05:30

My round little eyes opened to the world,
A soft loving hand capped my forehead,
Before the harsh ray of bright light
Hit the tiny circles, black and white.

My thin long fingers clasped the hand,
Knowing not they held a magic wand.
Like a mom, it protected me all through,
From every danger and dont-know-who.

It got me more love from all places,
And much more hands and embraces.
It fed me mentally and spiritually,
Taking my soul for a beau journey.

It lent its ears for all my troubles,
More often gave smiles and giggles.
Being with me and my everything,
It added lights n colors to my being.

It gave a recreation corner for my heart.
It gave a love factory for my life.

My own MIT, I Love You.
-- Aish --

Who am I??!

2008-02-05T18:58:00.000+05:30

There are answers to almost all questions on earth-either yes, no or don’t know. Who am I? – is the one question to which either of the three answers would be inappropriate because the question itself is so philosophical, spiritual, quizzical and what not.

Who am I? – when asked to myself, I got a number of answers. When I was a kid, I had not many friends, know why? My parents protected me from the cruel outside world and did not even allow me play outside, as the kids of the same age would do, because of unexplained reasons. So ‘an isolated kid’ was the answer no.1.

I grew up and joined new school. It was so strange to see eyes around me with question marks. Girls did not care to talk to me when only one guy made attempts to ask for my name (!) Few days after I stood top in my first class tests, many ‘bees’ buzzed around me to share lunches, chocolates and few even with pieces of advice like ‘I don’t think you should talk to that girl…she’s jealous of you’. I did not want to talk to all those who suddenly sprang. So ‘a proud and egoistic girl’ was the answer no.2.

Days passed and I met and befriended many like-minded people in school who shared good, selfless friendship, fought many a silly fights, had countless occasions of fun and above all shared forthright open hearted talks with those souls to whom I owe a lot. So ‘a caring, cheerful but slightly short-tempered teen’ was the answer no.3.

The start of college life and the journey through life continued with so many expectations, so much joy, so many new friends and as many boring lectures ;). I started to be level-headed, much more energetic. So ‘a balanced, humorous and kind young lady’ was the answer no.4.

Further a few more months passed by when I found the light of my life-an extremely caring soul and a symbol of chaste brotherhood, with whom I shared everything under the sun-untouched affection, uncut expressions and unconditional love that I had saved all my life. So ‘a loving, truthful sister’ was the answer no.5.

Then on, my life was brighter than ever before. I made quite many true and cute friends- a cheerful LEO, a tender PISCEAN, a charming GEMINI, a composed ARIAN and a loving SAGI., out of whom I was extremely comfortable and at ease with the lovable Gemini, shared a mature friendship with the Piscean and exchanged so much love with the Sagi. Apart from them, a Libran big brother and Piscean kiddo brother added meaning to my life. So ‘a supportive, frank, honest, sensitive as well as practical friend/sister’ was the answer no.6.

Six answers and do they suffice me?- “NO”.
“Tall, plump-enough-to-be-broken-when-dropped, friendly, loyal, 5% emotional, 20% sensitive, 25% romantic and 50% practical human being” was the answer no.7 and my reply to “who am I?”.

Today's 'CUPID'ity-the psychological perspective.

2008-01-31T16:26:00.000+05:30

Two pairs of anxious eyes looking (staring) at each other, exchanging some extra-ordinary abstracts, lips that bear unusually-tickled-emotions-based smile and together-held hands that know not where that grip came from and above all Siamese twins like attached hips-People say and believe these are outta ‘love’- an amusing feeling resulting outta adolescence and the related ‘pole vault’ of hormones. Most of today’s relationship are built on baseless bonds, rise and fall of uncontrollable emotions and bouncing mindsets of the youth.

Immature love relationships revolve around a single and sole cause of “unhappy family situations”. Guys and gals are unable to vent out their emotions to parents or siblings because they’re too busy for them and also constantly are interested in improving their ‘social status’ losing out their individuality, try to fool themselves wearing a mask.

Tender hearts are struck with sharp words and sarcastic behaviour at a relatively young age when actually wat they need are the warmth of a company, love of optimistic parents and some fun with siblings. Adolescents, especially those hailing from a family of both mom and dad attending offices or running a family business, are the ones who are the most troubled. They long for some time together to talk about their daily happenings but wat results is a lonely dinner at the dining table where the maid serves food while dad is on an overseas business call and mom is shopping somewhere in a mall. All these continuous unhappy incidents either pushes them to indulge in anti-social activities like internet porn and doping or fall into an immature relationship where their want is just a pair of ears which can listen to wat they say and in turn speak some nice words to soothe the hurt heart.

It is not only wen parents are busy, the child is psychologically depressed, there are so many other reasons like intra-family disputes, discouragement of the adolescent in the area of his/her interest and most cruel of all is the selective preference given to one child alone wen there are two or three in the house. The above said reasons are few common causes wen youngsters start resorting into relationships to find a shelter, to stay away from things they do not want to hear or undergo.

Psychology describes this as “Crying corner state” where wat ultimately the adolescent needs is a heart that can feel his/her emotions which is practically impossible. The sense of ‘love’ that develops out of emotional imbalance further branches out and takes complicated turns resulting in what is called ‘possessiveness’. It has become a fashion statement among youngsters to say “my lover is possessive of me”. They actually do not understand that d feeling of being possessive results because of insecurity of losing their ‘crying corner’ after which their life wud be miserable. But the very feeling of insecurity is quite obviously caused in the hearts because the relationship is more of an emotional dependence on each other which has been misinterpreted as ‘love’.

When youngsters start realizing what actually ‘love’ is, I’m sure there wud far lesser cases of broken relationships. Love is a feeling and not an emotion. An emotion is a play of hormones whereas a feeling is a responsive action to a caused stimulus. Once adolescents start understanding this fact, the emotional intelligence of the whole generation wud improve and there wud surely be an evolution of a new n better breed of humans. And for that wat they need is parental support and healthy-minded friends, who are the most influential people in anyone’s life. Love will thus have a newer dimension and can be helpful in building stronger relationships that are emotionally independent and fool-proof, influencing both the guy and the gal, positively.

The Clubs and their Blog services

2008-01-24T19:57:00.000+05:30

This blog really is a thanksgiving message corner to the many many clubs(certainly not the GGC of MIT :p) that are serving students through their broadminded social work in promoting bonds between innumerable pairs of love birds who are never finding their names in campus gossips ;) and never ever finding an opportunity to speak out cupid stories about themselves.

Dear Club n its countless energized members,

Sub – Thanksgiving for the honoring done ;)

This special blog message (hopes to find you in good amount of amusement as well as confusion) is specially posted in order to express heartfelt thanks to all those loving souls involved in such an awe inspiring work of giving to the world an amazing piece of write-up and also a prediction which couldn’t even be declared by the so called miss world herself ;)

It would be definitely an understatement to say that your service has brought mr.ruud and miss world closer than ever before ( miss world, as everyone knows always believes in making predictions come true) and the pair surely owes a big party to all the young and 24/7 enthusiastically working minds (of not the GGC :p) for the mind-blowing contribution to the relationship.

Thanking you,

Yours HONESTLY,
--me--

P.S- There's a wonderful coincidence to the present area of analysis and a yesteryear incident.About 35 years ago, a similar service(can be called by other name-gossip) lead to the marriage union of the famous couple-Nawab Mansur Ali Khan Pataudi and Sharmila Tagore.Even bigger coincidence is that the lead lady of that story and miss world are both inclined towards performing arts(theater in the former and music in the latter) and the heroes are both sport persons(cricket in the former case and cricket,football and many more love sports in the present case :p )

P.P.S- Pl do not ask delicate questions about Saif and Soha of the present case.They're too young to be involved in the media ;) They're safe n away from the cameras n correspondents o GGC :p

what women want???

2007-12-11T09:49:00.000+05:30

one hug to introduce d dawn,
one spoon o cornflakes feed,
one minute o prayer for her,
one wink as u race off ur car.

one cal on reachin office safe,
one sms sayin-"lunch awesome",
one sorry for comin home late,
one smile to brighten her face.

one drink together on her bday,
one quarrel a day to kno her better,
one kiss to say-"u're der for her",
one life to live together EVER!!

P.S-true to my knowledge,every woman wants only tis rather dan material gifts!!

Brotherhood

2007-12-11T09:44:00.000+05:30

I walked...
Alongside my road were leafless trees.
No nests on the branches,brown and dry.
Land,sandy that is,showed no moisture.
Winds that blew,hit my face steam hot.

I walked again...
Looking at the lifeless nature and
Crying for being left alone there.
The pain that stayed inside my heart
Grew multifolds and edged out of my soul.

I stopped to walk..
My fears personified and shook me terribly.
They pricked on my burns like thorns.
Poked my eyes with spades and spears
And made me fell hell out of nothing.

I thought...
Tears became so familiar to me.
Darkness sent me a friendship call.
'Pain' sang lullabies for my night.
Loneliness pushed me to the point of no return.

I felt...
A bolt out of the blue sky it was.
A sudden spring after the dark days.
An intimate warmth wrapped its arms
Around me and kept the coldness away.

I saw...
Birds chirping and flying around flowers
That had bloomed on the green trees,
Those stood tall on the grassy ground
And waved along with the chill breeze.

I found...
A bright light that illuminated my eyes.
A hand that clasped my shoulder so firm.
A pair of footprints along with mine,all thro'.
A heart that added meaning to my life.

I wondered...I rejoiced...jumped with joy..
I wondered at this relationship of love.
I rejoiced that there's someone for me.
I jumped with joy for having found
-THIS LIGHT,THIS LOVE,THIS LIFE
.---------THIS BROTHER--------
I love u bro..u mean so much to me..
---dedicated to all my brothers...Mahesh,Adharsh,Avinash,Ashwin,Ashok,Vivek.
Love ya all brothers...!
Aish.

PEOPLE N' PROBLEMS

2007-11-30T19:42:00.000+05:30

People n problems…eyes crossed thinking wat it means or wat on earth I really can ever write on tis topic…der is stuff pal…read on..

Writin tis out o my very own experience o seein day to day issues,I’d first like to say people r really so complex (mind u not complicated…complex is a step further….)
Wen der arises an issue at home or in coll or at workplace,ppl really lose demselves not knowin hw to deal wid dem,take weird decisions n draw even weirder conclusions…

Why do ppl really go crazy n end up screwing themselves??
Psychology explains it on very simple terms…its as simple as preparing for “professional ethics” paper for d semester ;) ha ha… ok jokes apart…r u thinking WTF is der to und?
If u r, u’re wrong….der is..Here it iz....

“LOOK AT ISSUES AND NOT THE PERSON INVOLVED,WEN U R IN A PROBLEM”

If u have understood tis line within quotes…tats it…u’re done n all set for a lovely n peaceful life..if u haven’t understood it…lemme help u out..

We always think and look at problems from our point o view.We are absolutely human…if u say tat u see it frm others’ view too, either u gotta be super psycho-analytical or jus plain stupid foolin urself…it is completely enough if u look at it from ur point o view alone…but look at it as an issue.Don ever keep in mind who is F***in involved in it…wat I’m tryin to communicate is – ‘you will really understand d issue better wen u see from a neutral state”.

I’d cite an example for better comprehension..
Jus imagine U’re a very honest person and really hate wen ppl do ‘wrong’ stuff.U have a best frend with whom u’ve been very close for years.One fine day u spot him/her doin something really sick…wch is extremely wrong..How shud u view d issue?

Simple…walk to ur fren n tell him/her…”jackass…y d hell did u do tat on earth??”
Don ever compromise on the fact tat he’s ur closest fren or see his face value.In fact u’re doin good to him.tis is wat is lookin at d issue n not d person involved.Its d loveliest o ways to solve problems both for urself n d other one.If he accepts wat u say,comfort him n give him ur support.If he doesn bother to listen…I’l say…u have found a very wrong company n its better u stay away frm him.

Else he might cause indirect sub-conscious troubles to u…ppl arnd n inside ur close circle r capable o anything I say…doin good or bad to u…they can influence ur mind so very well leavin u in d most sick o moods.

So ppl…Look at d issues alone…never at ppl concerned…u’ll really love being tis way once u start practicing it…u gotta follow it to believe it…
Tis particular teaching or logic is called – Personnel Comprehension and Attitude Modification.

The spicy aroma of variety...

2007-11-27T11:05:00.000+05:30

Its really not bout mughalai hyderabadi biriyani or navrathan kurma i'm gonna write... :P he he..i jus wanna write bout few things tat i observed yday...bout how many variety o ppl are around us...boy-o-boy...i jus cant digest...gulp... :o
But jus imagine if everyone was d same kinda-kiddo-thingy,aahh...life'd be too monotonous n also b/w...Well...we do need variety n tis holds gud even to ppl arnd u...

After d lil filthy exam o mine was over(in fact i came out 40 mins earlier ;)...) i was jus goin arnd places n observin leaves,flowers,ppl n of course more ppl...one guy over d fone(certainly aint a student...we shudn possess cell fones...damn...) was yellin out..." I don mind watever hell it is..I wan u to get it done n leave my pass book updated"..may be its some kinda business deal he was speakin bout..who knows n cares...?? wateva...next moment i heard a voice sayin "d surgery is due n gettin postponed cuz my husband hasn sent cash from abroad..my kid is cryin outta pain every night...". i turned n it was a lady wid a sympathetic tone...jus see d two diff situations...both gotta do wid money...one in deed n one in need...der's variety...

In d next 2nd minute ma fella frens started pourin out...i moved towards dem to inquire bout exams...guess wat i saw...one fren o mine pulled out his mobile fone,switched it on...askin me to hold on a few seconds...n yelled suddenly startling me to scare...."Macha...Sachin 50 da..."
Duh...how concerned n patriotic...newys its fun... :)

Eyein arnd i caught another group o gals...one sayin..."hey al gates set??" n der came a reply..."yaa re...our bread board is ready".. coupla to-be-engineers discussin deir project's development...n an abrupt spring in between " you got dose jewellery for ur bro's wedding reception??" before i cud catch,away fled d voice...

All dese within a span o jus 17 mins...mind u...jus a few mins n so much to watch,catch n observe den how much we're missing in dose times we are either troubling ourselves thinking bout d lost love or uncessary tiffs wid frens n not to miss d awe(ful)some lectures...

Cmon ppl...look arnd...der's everythin...lets learn d positives n beautiful stuff outta dem...enjoy d color n spice o variety widout blamin ppl's responses...Live ur way...live for today...!Cheers...!!!

L'amour de ma vie

2007-11-15T20:05:00.000+05:30

Beautiful are thy eyes and in them

I learn the meaning of our love.

Wonderful are thy smiles and in them

I feel paramount joy of our life.

Blissful is thy heart and in it

I see the future of our bond.

So very special is thee to me and in you

I find myself, wholly.

Love ya ji.

To My Master...

2007-10-01T19:52:00.001+05:30

MY MASTER...YOU INSPIRE ME...
Steering my blood in the path of your choice,
Gushing the breeze to the bottom of my lung,
Freezing my nerves with the invisible magic,
You rule my world,You are the one.

Touching every cell,not to forget any,
Breaking the cuffs chaining my life,
Lifting the burdens off my mind,
You rule my world,You are the one.

Setting your rhythms as my heart beat,
Breathing your chords as my life-line,
Living on your tunes,that complete me,
You rule my world,You are the one.

Casting a spell on each one you see,
Making an impact wherever you go,
Widening your horizons beyond the nation,
You make the world YOURS,you are the ONE.

-Dedicated to-
My master,the icon of music,the global indian~ ALLAH RAKHA RAHMAN.

A dream never dreamt...

2007-09-06T19:58:00.000+05:30

Every dawn, to wake up seeing thee
I wish you were always near me.

When you glide, tearing the fog,
On your footprints, I will jog.

I will find shelter under thy chin,
Saving the rain drops touching thy skin.

Even in the dark, your eyes shine
Sending chills deep down my spine.

Out of the veins, my blood drips,
When I feel your breath under my ribs.

For the fever that grows inside,
Under my blanket, thee, I hide.

As the full moon burns in fury,
Beneath the roof, we attain glory.

Reality is scary...

2007-09-06T19:54:00.000+05:30

Clad in scarlet robe, plain yet graceful,
Shawled around the neck, letting hair loose.
Walked in front of me, a pretty lady in 30s,
Who never smiled, for me to assure her dimples.

Into an abandoned building, she headed.
And proceeded, as her high heels echoed.
The cries of vampire bats did’nt bother her.
Neither she cared, the blubs of dripping water.

She halted outside a door open ajar-
Turned her head around and eyed.
The anxiety in her eyes confused me and,
Made me doubt if she was anti-social.

A sense of insecurity sprang in and out.
My perspiration represented my apprehensions.
Keeping aside my weaker emotions, I peeped,
Into the open room, with my heart pounding.

Inside I saw, a very beautiful kid, masked
Around his nose an’ mouth, playing with her.
She was sitting on her knees, looking at him,
Caressing his soft, pink and round cheeks.

I moved towards them and spoke to her.
My eyes brimmed with tears when I learnt,
She was a call girl and the mother of the kid,
On whom she had vested all her sins as CANCER.

To My Love...

2007-09-06T19:52:00.000+05:30

YOU ARE MY ANSWER,MY LOVE!

There were days, I spent long hours
Figuring out how my interrogation ends.
In everything I saw, I spotted a cause.
But “Why was I born?” quizzed me out.

A bee had its flower, an ant its sugar.
A dove had its letter, a fly its butter.
I wondered at all these tiny beings.
If one had another, who is mine?

All my questions together were answered,
Physically in blood and flesh, Jaan, its you.
Not to find you, I lived my life on earth.
I was born here just to ‘LOVE’ you.

DREAMS AND PSYCHOLOGY

2007-07-29T12:45:00.000+05:30

Everyday, to get out of bed with thoughts about previous night’s dreams are becoming so common these days. People share their dreams with their friends, colleagues, life-partner as some routine happening. But what actually are ‘DREAMS’?
Why do dreams come? All these are unanswered to any normal human being.

To start with, those who are now reading this blog would’ve had dreams that were so close to reality and sometimes even gone to the extent of predicting the future which also would’ve truly happened. It would’ve confused you at times if the happening was intriguing or it would’ve surprised you if the happening was fortunate. Even very shocking incidents such as prediction of death or accidents had taken place in few cases. Let us now see what exactly happens for a dream to occur during sleep and why weird things find part of it.

Every human being has a unique mindset or a sequential pattern of remembering, retrieving and forgetting incidents that happen around them. For all the people who live in this world, what is common, is that- Bitter or tragic incidents are difficult to forget and are stored in their sub-conscious memory/state as the core platform. The deepest, unfulfilled desires form their 2nd platform and their current life, associated people, their relationships form the 3rd platform on which is rested their conscious memory/state. Conscious memory supports their day-to-day activities, office/college life and their responses to them.

Conscious state(CS) has the ability to think and decide about people, actions, emotions and also our responses to it but the CS is often hidden by oneself or the society for various reasons such as social status, material gains and face value of people. When that happens, a person is disturbed from his normal being and acts in a way that is not suggested by his CS. He deviates from his thinking and is forced to think in a way that is accepted by all which results in what is called “internal conflict” which is the sole reason for ‘dreams’.

Sub-conscious state(SCS) has the power to accomplish and bring words into actions. This is why during ‘meditation’ or ‘yoga’, attainment of SCS is very important to achieve the state of perfect control of one’s self. Physically, the attainment of SCS is felt as the so called ‘drowsy feeling’ during deep meditation which is achieved only when CS ( i.e., the relationship problems, complicated emotions and reflexes)does not disturb the person.

Internal conflicts when left unsolved tend to start mild agitations in the SCS. The person becomes artificial and tries to keep himself under control by dreaming about his unfulfilled wishes. Continuous and deep thinking about those wishes alter the order of his preferences in his SCS. Alterations lead to rearrangement of the ‘already mentioned sequential pattern of the mind’ which in turn causes ‘dreams’.

So DREAMS occur due to psychological changes and can be attributed to the well-being of a person and his mental health. Not necessarily the dreams got to be connected with the person. A person who has a problem say ‘X’ can also get abnormal dreams about ‘Y’ for which there are more complicated reasons and theories of psychology. Great psychologists like SIGMUND FREUD have proposed and justified their theories about dreams.

But let us limit our exploration to this level and let us try to maintain good mental and emotional health for our well being. Let us only dream in the way Dr.Kalam wanted us to…

Keep smiling. Do things your way to stay healthy. Keep up your attitude.

A Thing of beauty..

2007-07-29T00:09:00.000+05:30

Dancing and dangling came down a mass
Of transparent nature- it rolled over
A plain, skinny and silky that is.
Over from above it showed me bright colors
Multiple of them crowning the mass.
It moved around the corner, slipping off
Across the valley deep and dissolved rite away.

My eyes searched and searched again
For to see that sight once more.
Suddenly to a startle, I heard a voice.
---- MY CONSCIENCE, it was----------

It asked- ‘ do you wish to see it again?’
I nodded affirmative.
‘you have to cry then…’, it said.
At once I realized that…
The lil’ mass was my tear drop.
“what an expression of variety” , I thought.
This is “ A BEAUTY IN GRIEF ’’.

Memories...being so..

2007-07-28T23:54:00.000+05:30

Two gloomy eyes that longed for love,
I found in a deep dark corner place.
As I walked carefully towards them,
Virtual images carpeted my path.
In them, I could see the eyes.
The eyes that bore all the sorrows.
The eyes that cried all the day.
Those were of a little girl.

Cold food and plain water, her meal.
Rocking chair and winter skies, her friends.
All day she sat on the freezing floor,
Searching for light, love and life!

Fastened doors kept watching the tiny her,
Pillow covers took all her tears to them.
The empty room haunted her tender soul,
Giant lizard shadows frightened her heart.

Still getting closer, my knees shook to walk.
Anxiety overflowed and restlessness fountained.
The eyes still stared at me, fixed upon me,
Giving a strong stir in the deep of my stomach.

Slowly in the dim light, I could see her visage.
Little by little all her features were seen.
So much less I could realize then..
It was none except the little ME!

I wept out loud after long years..
Thinking how my life had changed.
Troubles had taught me to face miseries.
Sorrows built lead walls for my heart.

Reasoning and thinking were what I learnt,
From the long lonely periods of my life.
It had instilled in me this unique power,
That made me the ‘one’ and what I am today!

**my work**